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Halo Violation: A Secret Baby Sports Romance Page 8
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Mom said no. She thanked me for the offer, but said she was perfectly content with her life just as it is. She said she was an able-bodied woman, capable of providing for herself, and she would never turn to me for support unless it was a matter of necessity.
For the life of me, I don’t know why wants to settle on being “perfectly content” when she could be following her dreams. She always used to talk about opening her own restaurant one day, but this was before I became a millionaire.
Man, she drives me up a wall. But even so, I love the hell out of her.
We sit down at the kitchen table and I immediately dig in. On top of the orange beef and barley, she made spoonbread and ribbon zucchini. Before Mom’s even made a dent in her meal, I’ve scarfed mine down and I’m ready for seconds.
“My god, Eric,” she says with a laugh. “Where do you put it?”
I lean back in my chair and answer her with a lengthy belch.
“Manners!” she scolds, playfully. “Honestly, though. If I ate even half of what you ate, I’d weigh five hundred pounds.”
“Not if you spent four hours a day training, lifting and on the field practicing.”
“I suppose that’s true. Can I get you some more?”
She reaches for my plate, but I wave her hand away.
“I can get it myself, Mom.”
I head over to the stove and start dishing up a second helping of everything.
“So, what’s the plan for tomorrow?” I ask.
She finishes chewing and pats her mouth with a napkin before answering. “Well, I thought we might spend the day here at home, just visiting and relaxing. Your aunt and uncle have invited us over for Christmas dinner. Roxie’s home from college, so all your cousins will be there.”
“Cool.”
“That’s one option,” she says, “but there is another alternative. Your father stopped by earlier today. He wants you to spend Christmas dinner with him.”
“Really?” I say with a groan.
I head back to the table and take a seat before attacking the food on my plate.
She shrugs. “It was a heartfelt invitation, Eric. I’m the first one to talk trash about that man, but I can tell he’s serious about wanting to build a relationship with you.”
Yeah, well...
In this case, it’s a matter of too little, too late. Ever since I was born, my dad has been popping in and out of my life whenever he felt like it. And most of the time he was off doing his own thing. I went months—years without seeing him, and for a kid, that’s a long ass time. It was a shitty thing for him to do to me. Now that he’s older and settled down with his new wife and had a couple more kids, suddenly he wants to start playing happy families.
And I hate that my mind goes there, but there’s a part of me that wonders if he’d be so eager to reconnect with me if I wasn’t an NFL player. He isn’t that much of a fuckhead. At least, I don’t think he is.
“No way am I ditching you on Christmas, Mom.”
“You wouldn’t be ditching me.” She gives me a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry about that. I plan on having Christmas dinner with my sister and her family either way.”
“Well, I plan to be there, too. You can tell Aunt Pam to set another place at the table.”
She loads up her fork with beef and barley, but before she takes a bite, she looks directly at me and says, “I know this is your decision, and I respect that, but before you make up your mind, I think you should consider how much your brother and sister might want to see you.”
Shit, man.
“Thanks a lot, Mom.”
“Just think about it, will you?”
I sure as hell don’t want to think about it. I know it’s not really the same thing, but my presence in their life is a lot like how my dad’s presence was in mine. I’m this random guy who shows up every few months—or every few years—and then after a brief visit, I’m gone.
And shit. I don’t want to be that guy. Lily and Zachary are great kids. I don’t want them to end up resenting me.
“Okay, how about this? Their house is kind of on the way to Aunt Pam’s house. Maybe I can rent a car and head out an hour or two before dinner, stop and spend some time with them before joining the rest of you guys?” I suggest.
“That sounds good, but you’d have to drive all the way back into Toledo to get you a rental car, and that might be tricky to pull off on Christmas day.”
She’s right about that. And I know the car service I took from the airport is going to be closed tomorrow.
“I don’t suppose you’d consider coming with me?” I ask Mom, giving her my most innocent, wide-eyed look.
“Not a chance.”
Yeah, that figures.
“However,” she says, “I’m almost positive that one of your cousins would be willing to drive out and pick me up. My money’s on Roxie. I have a feeling she’ll embrace the chance to get away from the rest of the family for a while.”
“You’re probably right about that.” I laugh.
From what I’ve heard, Roxie has developed a major passion for all things political since she started college. She’s constantly going on about social injustice and the government corruption, and she doesn’t exactly see eye-to-eye with my aunt and uncle.
“Then it’s settled. You can take my car.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
I load up a huge forkful of ribbon zucchini and stuff it into my mouth. I’m not exactly stoked to see my old man. He was a shitty father, and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive him for disappointing me over and over until I finally developed a thick enough skin to deal with the rejection.
Yeah, all right. I’m still kind of bitter, but I’m just going to have to suck it up. I don’t want the issues I have with him to keep me from creating a bond with my little brother and sister.
Two wrongs don’t make a right and all that shit.
One thing’s for certain: when I have kids of my own someday, I’m going to 100% present in their lives. I’m going to be so fucking hands-on; it’ll probably drive them crazy. They’ll be begging me to leave them alone. But I won’t. I’m going to do everything within my power to make sure they never feel rejected, unworthy or unloved. Never. Not for one second.
12. MOLLY
Well...things could be worse. It’s not like I was expecting my parents to be happy about the baby or anything, at least right after hearing the news, but it sucks that things are so awkward at home.
Dad’s not exactly giving me the silent treatment, but close enough. Whenever he says something to me (which happens a lot less often than usual and is mostly limited to things like “pass the butter”) I see this pained look in his eyes that just about breaks my heart.
I’ve been a daddy’s girl my whole life. As the baby of the family, especially, I’ve always been able to charm him with my smile and get away with maybe more than I should have. Well, now that I’m pregnant and unmarried, the entire dynamic of our relationship has changed, and I don’t even know how to act around him anymore. I think he feels the same. So we’re like strangers, in a way, and this really sucks.
Christmas was an absolute nightmare. I wish we could have just fast-forwarded through the whole day because it was beyond uncomfortable. My parents and I opened presents and went through the motions, exchanging polite words of thanks, ignoring all the tension under the surface. Mom spent most of the day in the kitchen, cooking, as Dad and I sat in the living room in uncomfortable silence. He read the paper while I texted my friends. Talk about awkward.
Things changed a bit after Christmas, though, at least when it comes to Mom. She made an appointment for me to see Tricia’s ob-gyn, and she came into the examination room with me. Not much happened during the appointment. Aside from weighing me and taking blood pressure, the doctor mostly just explained the timeline and told me what to expect. She also gave me a due date—August 16th. When the doctor named the date, Mom reached for my hand and gave it a squeeze. That’s when I
knew she was really starting to come around.
As we left the doctor’s office together, I could swear I sensed her warming to the idea of a new, surprise grandchild. I searched my mind for the perfect words to say that would be touching and heartfelt, and would help repair the tears in our relationship.
But of course the perfect words continued to elude me so I thought it would be a good idea to lighten the mood. I ended up saying, “On the bright side, I won’t be ‘traipsing’ around Europe next year.”
She gave me a strange look. For a moment there, I wondered if I’d just killed the moment by making a dumb joke. And then her lips spread into a smile.
She shook her head and said, “I should hope not!”
So things are definitely looking up now that Mom’s coming around. It’s been hard, though. I don’t know what I would have done without my friends, who have been absolutely amazing.
“Are you going to eat your placenta?” Colette asks.
Looks like I spoke too soon...
I put down my fork and push my plate away, bracing myself for a wave of nausea.
“Eww. That’s disgusting.” Nina groans.
“Oh, don’t be so provincial,” Colette tells her. “It’s a totally natural thing.”
“You know I heard somewhere there’s a way to take the placenta and encapsulate it,” Helena says. “That way, you don’t have to actually bite into it or blend it up into soup or something. You can just take it in pill form.”
“Can we please not talk about this right now?” I beg the girls.
“Oh, I’m sorry, Molly,” Helena says.
“Yeah, I’m sorry too,” Colette says.
“Are you all right?” Nina asks me.
I nod gingerly. Thank goodness the nausea seems to have passed. Pregnancy is so weird. I haven’t had a single bout of morning sickness, but certain sights, smells and even thoughts upset my system.
“So, have you decided where you’re going to live after the baby’s born?” Helena asks, taking a dainty sip from her wineglass.
“No, not yet. I mean I’m not sure what neighborhood. I’m definitely going to want to find a place in Manhattan. Probably downtown.”
Helena nods in understanding. The Upper West Side is Tricia’s neck of the woods, and I don’t want to live that close to her. I’m still pretty freaked out by the fact that she and Beth both seem to want to poach my baby. And the Upper East Side is definitely out. That’s where Eric lives, and I do not want to run the risk of bumping into him on the street or something. Especially not if I’ve got the baby with me.
I shudder at the very thought of it.
“Greenwich Village would be nice,” Nina says. “I could see you living there with the kid.”
“Yeah, I’m definitely thinking Greenwich. Or maybe the Lower East Side.”
“Oh, totally,” Colette says. “I can’t believe how much that neighborhood has changed in the last few years. I was shopping down on Orchard Street yesterday and you would not believe how many people were out there, wheeling those giant strollers that take up the whole sidewalk. Ugh. It was so annoying.”
I fold my arms across my chest and give her a playfully scolding look.
“Oops.” She laughs. “Sorry, Molly.”
“Apology accepted.” I reach for my glass of apple juice and take a sip. “I totally know what you mean, though. And I promise I won’t become one of those obnoxious women who dominate public space with a ridiculous amount of baby paraphernalia.”
“Just as long as you won’t try to cram your baby stroller into a packed subway during rush hour,” Nina says.
“I would never.”
“Especially if you’re kid is old enough to walk and you’re just using the stroller to lug your shit around,” Helena adds. “I hate when people do that.”
“Are you kidding?” I laugh. “I am never going to be one of those women. No way. Give me a little credit, would you?”
“I don’t know, Moll. The road to Hell is paved with good intentions,” Nina says.
“Whatever.”
I give her a friendly kick under the table.
“So, are you going to tell your advisor about the pregnancy?” Colette asks.
“I’m not sure yet. I have no idea how big I’m going to get, so I could potentially breeze through until graduation, leaving the faculty none the wiser—or maybe just let them think I’m getting fat.”
“Why bother to hide it? It’s not like you’re a teenager and it’d be some big scandal or something,” Nina says.
“I don’t know if that’s entirely true. Don’t forget this is Sarah Lawrence we’re talking about,” I point out. “The fact that I’m putting my academic and professional pursuits on hold to raise a child before establishing my career is akin to getting knocked up at the age of fourteen in the real world.”
“Oh, you are such a drama queen.” Helena rolls her eyes. “You’ll probably end up writing some fascinating dissertation on blending the roles of motherhood and professional achievement in today’s world, which you’ll turn into a book that’ll end up hitting the bestseller lists.”
“Or maybe not. Maybe you’ll turn into like this totally chill, mother nature type person who spends her days in a field with her child, collecting flowers or something,” Nina says.
I stare back at her for a moment before bursting out in laughter.
“What are you talking about? Where would I even find a field?”
My friends’ suggestions are extreme, no doubt, but it is interesting to think about what kind of mother I’m going to be. I really have no idea what it’ll actually be like. By the time the baby comes, I’ll have my bachelor’s degree. I’ll have some money. And that’s about it. That’s all I have figured out so far. The fact that my future is a blank canvas stretched out in front of me is definitely a little scary, that’s for sure, but it’s also kind of exciting.
I can’t wait to meet the baby and start this new chapter in my life. Sure it’ll be hard, but there’s not a doubt in my mind that the joy will overweigh the struggle by far. I know in my heart that I made the right decision.
When I get home after lunch with the girls, Mom calls me into the living room.
“What’s up?” I ask as I shrug my coat off.
“I’ve been thinking...”
She pats the sofa cushion next to her. I drape my coat over my arm and walk across the room to sit down with her.
“Your father and I have plans to attend a charity dinner tonight in support of the scholarship program that Cody Washington is spearheading.”
“That’s cool.”
“I think you ought to consider attending the event in my place,” she says. “Things can’t go on like this with you and your father hardly speaking to each other. Something has to be done. And if you accompany him to the dinner tonight, it would be a wonderful way to show your support for his team and their endeavors. I think it’d be a lovely gesture that might help the two of you get your relationship back on track.”
She’s got my attention now. It’s a nice idea and all, but I’d have to be out of my mind to walk blindly into a situation where I might find myself face to face with Eric Wenzel. I have to play this cool, though, so I don’t raise any suspicions.
“Oh, I don’t know, Mom.” I shrug. “All the players will be there, right? No doubt Dad will spend the whole night talking to them and I’ll be bored out of my skull.”
I know I sound like a total brat, but you gotta do what you gotta do, and I’m looking at the big picture here.
“Plus, I’m exhausted. And I’ve been feeling a little light-headed today,” I add.
This isn’t really true, but I feel the need to redeem myself a little.
“As a matter of fact, I believe Cody will be the only player at the dinner tonight. The guest list consists mostly of old New York money and society families. Apart from Bruce Maddox—and Cody, of course—I believe your father will be the only other guest who’s connected to the Viper
s.”
“Really?”
She shrugs. “As far as I know, yes. In any case, why should it matter? I know it won’t be the most exciting night of your life, Margaret, but that’s hardly the point. You and your father need to work on repairing your relationship, and I think this would be an excellent way to start.”
She’s got a point. It might be nice to get dressed up and accompany Dad to the event tonight. If nothing else, it’ll be an opportunity to show him how much I’ve matured in the past few years. The last time I was his “plus one” at a charity event, I was a sullen eighteen-year-old brat who spent the whole night in a sulk. Tonight, I’ll be the perfect daughter. I’ll do him proud and he’ll start warming towards the idea of the new grandkid.
“You’re right, Mom. This is a good idea.”
As long as I don’t have to worry about running into Eric Wenzel, I am totally in. I really need Dad’s support right now.
13. ERIC
I’m peering at the contents of my refrigerator, trying to decide what to have for dinner, when the phone rings.
It’s my teammate, Cody. I answer the call.
“Hey, what’s up?”
“Dude, please tell me you’re free tonight,” he says.
“Well, I was planning on hitting some clubs downtown with Derek. Why?”
After exhaling a big sigh of relief, he goes on to tell me about how the entire Van Gesker family is still in Bern because of some crazy snowstorm and they could be trapped in Switzerland for days. I’m wondering why he’s sharing this news with me—why he thinks I would give a shit—when he finally gets to the point.
“They were supposed to occupy an entire table tonight—all twelve place settings. I got John and Claudia, John Jr. and his wife, Elizabeth, Kathryn and that French movie director she’s dating—”
“So, they won’t be able to show up?”
I’m sorry to have to cut him off, but jeez. I don’t want to sit here as he lists the whole Van Gesker clan.
“Exactly,” he says.
The tension in his voice is palpable. Not that I have any idea as to why. I don’t see what the big deal is. Unless... Is this about the money he was hoping to raise for his charity?